My Will or Yours?

“Thy Kingdom come. Thy will be done on earth as it is in Heaven…” is how the habitually unnoticed prayer mumbles. My Will or Yours? Really?

Cursed with an annoyingly endless amount of curiosity, I obsessively ponder the things of life which (and here is the curse) only leads to more questions. There might be a diagnosis in the “obsessive” piece but that will have to wait. I am an obsessive ponderer. I was pondering the other day…what would I do if my child needed a life-saving medicine, I had it in my hot little hands and God standing next to me said not to use it but he wasn’t going to stop me? Would I obey? No. (It’s a guess but probably close. Let’s not pretend.)

I didn’t walk away from this little scenario full of judgment. I just continued to ponder it. This pondering obviously leads us to the horrifying biblical stories of Abraham and Isaac, Hannah and Samuel, Moses and Moses’s mom (none of us know her name.) These are reasonable stories to recall but I went to the Garden.

This might be more revealing that I am aware of but this pondering took me to the question of power. My questions was this, “how hard could it possibly have been to not eat a fruit?” I love fruit. I love mangoes, kiwi, strawberries, tomatoes (technically a fruit) but not enough to have a “face-off” with God. Secretly, like many of you, I have condemned and blamed Eve for her “stupid” decision. I am being honest. Yet, here is the nasty little truth, we reenact Eve’s sin every day. My Will or Yours? This remains the question.

Right now, my life is front-end loaded with cow-pies. Life-altering fertilizer. I didn’t plan it that way. I prepared quite nicely for it NOT to happen. Yet manure is what I have. Please don’t even tell me that this is what makes flowers grow. I would have to smile at you, encourage you to have a “blessed” day and walk away. Bat guano is just that bat guano.

So, back to question… My Will or Yours?   Let me be clear, I do not in any way believe that we are to be passive recipients of life and call it “God’s will.”  I believe He has invited us to be vocal, active participants in a shared life with Him. So, I have done everything in my power to strategize the removal of this offensive, odoriferous obnoxiousness but it remains. I don’t believe Heaven missed a memo or His hand is too short. I don’t believe there is a Heavenly emergency session because things have gotten “out of control.” Then meadow muffins are what I have. He knows it and He seems to be okay with it. So I am working at accepting my situation with some little truths that I can hold at this time. These are mine. They don’t have to be yours. God is good. God is for my good. God is acutely interested in my life. God is good.

So, Thy Will Be Done is what I can say today at this moment.

-Tee